I think the biggest adjustment I've had to make since the surgery is really adjusting to a life on anti-seizure medication. My complaints primarily revolve around the fact that I am always tired, always. It makes you feel just a hint of fogginess persistently and I'm sure eventually I will adjust and feel energized again. And to be fair, I have been extremely busy this semester. This effect does seem to worsen during certain stages of the menstrual cycle (and I'm really sorry to bring this up but I gotta put it down in case someone else who's recently had brain surgery reads this). But I know that seizures and epilepsy in general can be affected by menstruation and hormone fluctuations.
My second issue is that my temperature regulation is completely screwed up, meaning I think the drug is affecting my hypothalamus in some way... a colleague of mine "the other neuroscientist" as I like to call him, looked into it and it seems that may be the case after all. I cannot tolerate heat, I mean... at all. I feel like an 85 year old woman (no offense to you 85 year old women out there) but I have to sit down in the shade when I'm in an area that is hot. This week one of the classrooms I teach in regularly was super hot... I'm not sure why it was so hot, but it's been fixed and today it felt amazing. But anyway - hot classroom - one of these days it was so hot that I was in and out and feeling like I was going to pass out. And I did consider canceling class which sounds easy enough but these are 3 hour long labs and we only meet once a week. -- Obviously I made it through but I was definitely sweating by the end of that class. - Also, about a month ago I decided to go to an LSU game with Jordan and I couldn't tailgate. As soon as the sun hit me and I ran out of water I was out for the count. Like a post-menopausal woman, there I am sitting in front of the fan with a cold water bottle on my neck, taking deep breaths just about to lose it. My friends and Jordan had to keep checking on me and it really was just super embarrassing. I just want to have fun and be outside and live my life, and apparently I can't do that in the daylight anymore... maybe I'm becoming a real life vampire (without all the blood stuff). -- Side note... but even stranger, after this occurred my feet were so swollen, like little marshmallows and they stayed that way for hours. Edema, they jiggled when I walked... it was hilarious. (note: the edema had everything to do with my diet for the day and not drinking enough water, and nothing to do with the medication). I have a picture of my feet, but I'll spare you because it's weird looking at other people's feet.
A final complaint is sensitivity to loud noises. I cannot be places that are loud, it makes me immediately, irrationally agitated. Not aggressive, just extremely sassy and defensive. It's the weirdest sensation and I recognize, even at the time that it's ridiculous. Especially when it is a busy restaurant or grocery store. I don't really experience social anxiety anymore but I am certainly still struggling to do things that are loud and busy with a lot going on. Who knows.. maybe I'm just losing my mind. And trust me, I've thought about it... at this point in my life and stage of recovery it really is better to have a few minor side effects than to have seizures. Unfortunately I have had quite a few auras over the last few months but luckily, no seizures so it does seem the medication is working. And my stress and anxiety revolving around the possibility of having seizures has gone away for the most part. Some days when I'm feeling particularly bad I hope for a seizure so that feeling goes away and I know it sounds bizarre but the anticipation is just the worst. But as far as I know I have had any sort of partial or grand mal seizure, although apparently auras are classified as simple partial seizures. And my auras have a range of different times, sometimes it's just a few seconds, and sometimes they last several minutes... sometimes I just feel kind of buzzy all day long. Maybe a seizure disorder is also like a box of chocolates - you never know what you're gonna get.
It's been such a long time since I've written a post that I truly don't know where to begin. School started obviously and the semester is about to come to end now actually... I think we have about 2 and a half weeks left until finals begin. This has been a particularly busy and challenging semester so I can't say I'm not waiting for winter break. But I gotta say, my job really is super fun. And I get to do a lot of amazing things and meet a lot of amazing people.
I went into Lafayette for Art Walk in August and it just so happened to be the weekend the water gates opened up and flooded the entire city. I couldn't believe it when my dad woke me up at 7:00am and told me to move my car because it was flooding outside. The water kept rising, and rising and rising and by 9:30am water was coming into the house. And it just kept rushing in. I stood there and watched water come through the walls, it was so crazy. And my parents entire bottom floor had to be demo'd and reno'd and of course my family didn't have flood insurance like many of the residents in the area but, well... that's life I guess. We got off easy, a lot of families in the area lost their entire homes and all of their belongings and of course FEMA didn't provide assistance to many of the people who requested it. And because it's Lafayette the city came together, helped each other and got even stronger in the wake of the devastation. It was actually the weekend before classes started and I was extremely worried I would have to miss my first day of classes. Somehow I made it back to New Orleans in the 6 hour window where I10-E wasn't flooded through Baton Rouge.
This is their front yard.
My parent's backyard, and my mom's very large green house.
My bestie I told you all about who found out she was pregnant in late January had a perfect, beautiful daughter almost 2 weeks ago. Bailey and her husband Pete are so happy and filled with love and I already know their child is going to have such a fantastic life. I'm proud of you guys!
I renewed my membership at my gym again in early September, lying to myself that I would really start exercising again. Don't get me wrong... I tried to at first but now I haven't been in almost a month. What a shame. I've just been too tired and too busy and at work I walk at least 5 miles a day so that's kind of like exercise... right? I usually wear heels too, and I feel like heels burn more calories than flats -- no scientific evidence supports this theory though. I do think it's funny, all the lies we tell ourselves or tasks we suddenly have when it's time to work out. And as most of us know, you always feel pretty good after working out and think "huh that wasn't so bad" - maybe I'll go to the gym tomorrow (maybe not). I'm actually planning on baking a ton of pie tomorrow, for no other reason than I have a pumpkin and a lot of apples. And I feel like baking pies all day may be too time consuming to be able to exercise hahahaha. But seriously... I should probably start taking better care of my heart.
Not much else to report on really. It does seem my temporary period with no clumsiness has passed and I am back to bruising myself and breaking things on a regular basis. One of my other besties Jen claims there's a gene that increases your chances of being clumsy and I'm not sure I buy it but I really thought it was because of the brain tumor. But no.. it's really just a part of me, where there is Charlie there is a trail of broken, dirtied, and destroyed things. I can't say I've been sleeping very well either, which could be the true source of the clumsiness. Unfortunately I'm still really not able to garden, it's just been way too hot. And I am still having just the slightest blood pressure issues that prevent me from getting up and down. I'm hoping it will cool down the next few weeks and I'll be able to weed the garden and get some cold weather crops in the ground. I did harvest 2 really beautiful, delicious pineapples that took me 3 years to grow.
What else is there to say right now? Way to go Cubs, congratulations on your massive, astounding win! I love the Saints and Drew Brees is getting me so many fantasy points! What the hell is up with election and does anyone else have the dread cloud hovering over them? But still, get out there and vote folks.
No comments:
Post a Comment